on worry
written by Jasmine Irven
None of us expected this pandemic; the changes to our lifestyle, the unknowns, the sense of a lack of control. It has become all too easy to feel overwhelmed.
When we have too much to do, too little time, too little support, etc., our stress levels are at the highest. We're constantly worrying about what's happening, making it hard to find a sense of calm or be productive.
And so, our mantra for the week:
"I choose to change the things I have control over, and to accept and release the things I cannot."
Worry is a type of thinking, it's repetitive, often troubled, about the future or the past. It's easy for this to become a habit, and even worse, we often reward ourselves when the thing we’re worrying about doesn’t happen (our brain tricking us in thinking, “see, it didn’t happen, that’s because I worried about it”).
Now, there are definitely good forms of worry, functional worry that allows us to review our options and solve problems. But there is also this bad worry; worry that is circular, doesn't go anywhere or solve anything and paralyzes you.
Our mantra this week revolves around the importance of distinguishing between these two types of worry, by asking ourself an important question: "is it likely I can do anything about this?"
Possible outcomes:
"Yes, I can change it" = action. Have a set time to worry, review your options, and then move on and take action. Often times people don’t act because they don’t have the courage, they feel they don’t have the creativity or confidence, etc. So, if you are struggling to take action look at what might be holding you back and how you can address these. Take small steps, find a support network and move forward.
"No, I can't can’t change it" = focus on acceptance and intention. Meditate. Breathe. Shift your focus. Instead of thinking about the most negative response, think of a more positive outcome; put your energy in this intention (whether it actually changes the outcome or not - you become less anxious by focusing on where you want to go, rather than where you don’t want to go). Give the mind a positive focus.
"I'm not sure if I can change it" = collect more wisdom. Maybe talk to a wise friend, teacher, ask yourself what someone you admire would do, or what someone who is wise and genuinely cares about you would say in the situation.
I want you to enter the week with this mentality. Choosing to change the things you have control over by implementing intentional action, and accepting and releasing the things you cannot change.
Because if something is out of your control, it doesn't deserve your time and energy.
resources
This post was inspired by a lecture by Martin L. Rossman on how your brain can turn anxiety into calmness. Watch the full lecture here.
18 simple ways to reduce stress (blog post).
8 of our favourite inspirational quotes to get you through challenging times (blog post).
Simple ways to stay calm and positive amidst chaos, from 5 meditation teachers (blog post).
8 things to reassure you when you're feeling overwhelmed (blog post).
2-minute mindfulness practise (IGTV video).
"Words" - our inspirational board on Pinterest.
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about the author
Hey there! I’m Jasmine, founder of the Sustainable Bliss Collective, a Certified Meditation Teacher, and lover of all things self-care, slow-living, and personal development.
I believe that ambition and self-care can coexist, and as such I hope to encourage and inspire you to take care of yourself, breathe deeply, connect with who you are, manifest your dreams, enjoy the blissful moments of each day, and make an impact in this beautiful world we call home.
Connect with me on Instagram here!
