refining your life to match your vision
written by Jasmine Irven
Does this sound familiar?
You have big dreams for your life but your day-to-day doesn’t seem to reflect that.
Your schedule is full & you feel exhausted at the end of the day, yet you still don’t feel like you’re accomplishing anything.
It’s hard to get up in the morning because you aren’t driven or passionate about what you’re doing.
If this story sounds at all like you, first of all I understand how frustrating it can be. But, I also want to give you hope that you can turn things around. And I want to emphasize the impact of small, simple steps in helping you get there.
Here are a few things I’d recommend if you’re feeling unfulfilled in your life right now and are looking to refine your life to match the big dreams and vision I know you have for yourself.
brain dump
First, I’d recommend you do a brain dump and/or stream of consciousness writing. These journaling practises involve writing with no filter; allowing yourself to release anything that’s on your mind.
“There is no wrong way to do [stream of consciousness writing] – they are not high art. They are not even “writing.” They are about anything and everything that crosses your mind– and they are for your eyes only. ”
— JULIA CAMERON
This means there’s no judgement about what is being written – you just write. Whatever’s on your mind, whatever is causing you tension, whatever is taking up space – write it down.
So, make a cup of coffee or tea. Light a candle. Set the mood. And then grab a journal or a few sheets of blank paper, and begin writing. Don’t filter yourself. Don’t worry about what will happen if someone else sees what you’re writing. Don’t worry about being realistic. Don’t worry about knowing the why or the how. Just write whatever’s been on your mind.
guided journaling
After you’ve cleared your mind as much as is possible with some free-flow journaling, move into some guided prompts. These prompts should give you a little bit more clarity on your values, intentions, etc., which will be helpful in determining the direction you should move in going forward.
Below I’ve listed a few of my favourites, but Pinterest is a great resource for prompts, as is this blog post on 33 journal prompts for self-discovery.
How have I been feeling lately? Why?
How do I want to feel?
What actions help me to feel this way? (P.s here is a list of 92 simple pleasures that may give you some inspiration here).
What have I said no to recently? How does that make you feel?
What have I said yes to recently? How does that make me feel?
What’s important to me?
If money was a non-issue, what would I spend my time doing?
What do I love to talk about?
What does my dream life look like?
What needs to be added to my life? Removed?
What is holding me back in life right now?
What limiting beliefs do I need to shift?
So often we are either consumed with other people’s content, or are filtering ourselves and what we write/say/feel to fit into some image that the world deems appropriate.
When this happens our own ideas, values, and opinions become diluted or lost. We know longer know what we stand for. What we believe in. What is meaningful to us.
And how can we expect to create a fulfilling and meaningful life if we’ve lost sight of what’s important to us? We can’t.
practises for more clarity
Getting clarity on what’s important to you is a key part in this process. So, beyond journaling see what else you can do to connect with your inner self. Meditate (or try these alternatives to meditation), go on a walk, try some visualizations, talk to yourself out loud, etc.
determine your ideal day
Close your eyes. Take 5 deep breaths, breathing in through your nose (bringing in cool, crisp air embodying a fresh slate), and out through your mouth (releasing any heat and tension from your body).
Now envision what your dream life looks like. Imagine yourself waking up in your dream home. Where are you? What do your surroundings look like? How do you start your day? What does your daily routine look like? Who is there with you? How are you spending your time? What practices or rituals have a part in your life? What do you do for fun? How do you feel?
Get a super clear vision of what your life looks like. Write down everything you saw in this vision that you want for your life. These are your big picture goals – the things you hope to accomplish in your lifetime. Maybe you want to write a book, buy a house, start a family, move somewhere new. NO judgements. This is your vision.
Now, compare with with where you are now. What’s currently filling up your calendar? Do these things reflect your values? Are they important to you? Ask yourself why your calendar is filled the way it is. Then, start to cut down or make shifts saying no to things that don’t serve you.
Immediately delete things that really don’t need to be there. Then move into plans you’re not super excited about. How would it feel to cancel these?
If there are things on the list you can’t change currently (i.e. a job you don’t like but it pays the bills) - ask yourself what you can do in the meantime to make it a little bit more enjoyable. Can you ask for a raise? Delegate work? Approach your boss about implementing some work boundaries? Going for a walk at lunch?
Know that there’s going to be an adjustment period. That’s understandable. But what you can do is recognize where improvements or adjustments need to be made, and set goals for these changes to take place.
setting goals
Now it’s time to begin to put some of these dreams into action. Maybe consider doing another brain dump outlining some of the things involved in your dream life (write a book, own a home, buy a car, have a family, become an entrepreneur, etc.). And then, decide on the next one you want to work on.
Often I think we become overwhelmed because we ask too much of ourselves. We put too much on our to-do lists that they’re impossible to finish and so we become overwhelmed.
This is one of the reasons I advocate for small, sustainable action.
So, sort your goals. Hone in on which one is most important to you in this season. Then write down 3 mini goals you could complete within the next 1-2 weeks that will get you closer to this goal.
For example if your goal is to own a home, maybe your action items are:
Set up an auto-deposit by Monday to start moving $50 to a “future home” account each week.
Apply to 4 higher paying jobs by next week.
Post 5 items on Facebook Marketplace by Friday.
Once these are complete, give yourself 3 more goals for the following week or two. Continue to break the goal down into actionable steps, and work on taking these steps consistently. You’ll be surprised how quickly things start happening!
P.s. if you’re looking for a more intensive goal-setting session, check out our ultimate goal-setting guide!
continue to fill your cup
You cannot expect to make progress on your goals if you aren’t taking care of yourself.
Meditate. Go on walks. Start a morning routine. Curate your perfect nighttime routine. Get off social media. Spend time with loved ones. Make nourishing food. Drink water. Stretch. Open the windows. Laugh.
Focus on your well-being and your motivation, drive, and energy levels will improve drastically. 💛
continue to be inspired
Surround yourself with people who lift you up. People who inspire you to be a better person and do big things with your life. And when you can’t find these people in your own life, connect with them online.
Listen to podcasts that inspire you. Read books on topics you’re interested in. Curate your social media feeds to be positive and educational. Watch a Ted Talk. Watch a documentary.
Curate your environment to be a positive, uplifting space and the results on your growth will be incredible.
final thoughts
You are capable. You have the ability to create an amazing life for yourself. You are enough as you are (and never forget that!), but you are also able to continue to grow and dream bigger. Give yourself grace. Have gratitude for where you are. And continue to move forward with intention.
Sending you so much love + strength.
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about the author
Hey there! I’m Jasmine, founder of the Sustainable Bliss Collective, a Certified Meditation Teacher, and lover of all things self-care, slow-living, and personal development.
I believe that ambition and self-care can coexist, and as such I hope to encourage and inspire you to take care of yourself, breathe deeply, connect with who you are, manifest your dreams, enjoy the blissful moments of each day, and make an impact in this beautiful world we call home.
Connect with me on Instagram here!
